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Love in its truest sense is freedom. It is an expansive force that accepts and embraces all that we are. Within relationships, love is the ability to be able to have unconditional acceptance of another without judgement.

Often we confuse love with attachment. Attachments keep us bound in illusions. Attachments make us look for permanence within what can never be permanent — the material world. Everything in the material world is subject to the law of birth and death. So if we attach ourselves to something that will inevitably come to an end, we will suffer.

This kind of attachment is prevalent in our relationships in our modern world where we look for permanence and stability in another person, instead of connecting to that essence within us that is permanent, our spirit, our soul.

There are fewer things more painful than getting your heart broken. Yet it is an experience that all of us have to go through at some point or another. Failed relationships are painful in and of themselves, but then there are relationships that break us in more ways than one. Relationships that are as painful during their course as they are when they end. Often relationships that are unhealthy and painful are harder to recover from than the ones that don't touch us in that way.

You can have joyous, happy and loving relationships, you can learn to break through the blocks that keep you from experiencing true intimacy and connection. The key lies within your subconscious mind. Meditation is a tool to work with this subconscious mind, and allow what is within you to open your heart to love.

One day a few years ago, I woke up from sleep and as I dragged myself to the bathroom, I realized that I felt a hunger inside me that was coming from somewhere deep within. I sat with the feeling and eventually understood that I was feeling so empty and starved because I was starving for love.

At this time I was in an unhealthy relationship in which I was totally addicted to my partner. I focused all my time, energy and attention on him because I wanted him to fill up the void I was feeling. I was desperate and depressed because I felt like I wasn’t getting what I wanted from him. Yet, somewhere within me I knew that no matter what he did, it wouldn’t make me feel less empty.

All our relationships are a reflection of our relationship with ourselves. Through practicing yoga, we get to know ourselves on a deeper level. There is a saying that goes ‘how you do one thing is how you do everything’. When we are on the mat, it is an exploration not just of our bodies, but also of how we tend to treat ourselves and what our default ways of being are. For example, if during asana practice, we find ourselves getting impatient with ourselves or we find that there is a strong inner critic judging our practice, chances are that this critic exists in other areas of our lives as well. And if we are critical of ourselves, it will in some form or another, spill over into our relationships.

Human relationships are complex and challenging and beautiful, and a playground for us to learn about ourselves and who we are. Our intimate relationships reflect back to us our own patterns, thought processes and ways of being. In order to achieve harmony within a relationship, we need to learn to understand the way our partner sees and experiences the world.